Stuff You Should Know

Happy Thanksgiving…have some tortilla chips!


Since I’m taking the day off to spend time with the fam and eat until I’m practically sick, I guess that means the blog will sort of be on hiatus until tomorrow. In the interim, I want to wish all the faithful readers of TDOY (all eight of ya) the happiest of holidays. (By the way, the above cartoon is a subtle dig towards my good friend Sam Johnson, who’s on his “Why do white people eat green bean casserole?” kick again.)

Thanksgiving dinner is a sort of strange tradition in my household. Sure, we recognize the significance of this day, and we are truly thankful for gifts we receive, etc. I feel ashamed to admit this, but the main reason we sit down to dinner every time around this year is so we can have turkey sandwiches later on. Honest to my grandma, we’ll eat this afternoon at about 1:00, and then five hours later the turkey sandwich trek to the kitchen begins. (There’s nothing like getting a hoagie roll, slappin’ a big hunk of white meat and slavering that baby up with mayo…with a crisp, green lettuce leaf for color.)

This is why my contribution to the later menu will be whipping up a batch of my famous Atomic Bachelor Nacho Dip™. It’s no big secret that I admire the man known as Elisson because the guy is like the Deep South Graham Kerr; while I’m struggling to tear the foil off a Pop-Tart, he’s in the kitchen whipping up things like Apple-Scented Roasted Turkey with Cider-Calvados Gravy. (What the !@#% is a calvados, anyway?) So, though my culinary skills are on the same level as those of a fry cook at your local fast food jernt, here is my simple (emphasis on simple) recipe for a tasty nacho dip to eat with copious amounts of white corn tortilla chips.

Mmm mmm good.

Atomic Bachelor Nacho Dip


1 can of RoTel DICED Tomatoes and Chilis (although it doesn’t HAVE to be RoTel, you can use a knockoff like Kroger’s brand…but make sure they’re diced, or you are going to have to chop, and that’s a pain…RoTel makes a hot version of this, too—and while I was up for experimentation Mom talked me out of it)

1 block of Velveeta Mexican Cheese (hot or mild, depending how much of a wuss you are…my motto is, if it doesn’t make your nose run, it’s not worth the effort…anybody know why the Velveeta Mexican is no longer sold in the orange boxes?)

Jalapeno slices (optional)

This is a very simple recipe – take the block of Velveeta and cut it into cubes…then open the RoTel (don’t drain it, or the dip will be very, very THICK and hard to stir) into a large, microwave-safe bowl (oh, you can also heat this stuff up in a saucepan, but if the recipe has “bachelor” in the title, isn’t that kind of a clue that you’re going to be using a microwave?) and add the Velveeta cubes.

Heat on HIGH in the microwave for 5 minutes, stopping the microwave after 2 minutes to stir…if the dip is still a little lumpy after 5 minutes, you can put it in for an additional minute or two. Dip should be a little bit runny…serve with tortilla chips (white corn kind is preferable) and if you really want to take a walk on the wild side, you can throw in some optional jalapeno slices to perk it up…unfortunately, we’ll be eating this sans white corn chips—Mom opted for Fritos Scoops instead, because sister Kat only eats whole wheat tortilla chips. (For the record, my sister is one of those “I treat my body like a temple” types—as opposed to those of us who treat our bodies like pool halls.)

Some people like to wait until the dip firms up a bit…personally, I like the challenge of trying not to get the dip on my shirt…but that’s why some folks likes chocolate, and some likes vanilla…either way, it’s fast, it’s easy and delicious.

Okay, people—we’ve got turkey sandwiches to eat, so let’s get started. And, hey…let’s be careful out there…

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